Letting Go

When I started this painting a month ago, I was obsessed about learning how to get movement in my leaves by using shading and tones. I also thought it was time I stopped copying from my guidebook or other people’s drawings and learn to paint from a “live” subject (well my plant is a a living thing…) After all I started painting almost 6 months ago so I should be able to, right?

So instead of painting one leaf, I decided to paint a whole pot of leaves, yes why do easy when you can do complicated, I always say… its also a great way to get really frustrated and give up halfway, which I did. I left it aside for 3 weeks and finally finished it yesterday. By that time, I was completely lost among my leaves and just gave a few washes over the unfinished leaves and with wild abandon, did the background! It was scary but exhilarating to paint the background with no structure and even blending it with the leaves I had spent so much time trying to get the shading right. It’s still not right but at least now my brain understands it and my hands just need to catch up.

I guess, as a new friend just pointed out to me, I’m a perfectionist at heart. I know I was one growing up, but thought I lost it for good after raising 3 kids. Its very frustrating to be a perfectionist and wanting to be a semi-abstract botanical artist at the same time. Nevertheless I’ve decided to embrace my need for perfection by mastering the basics and knowing all the rules, before I go about breaking them! I signed up to tons of online drawing lessons and I’ll continue copying other people’s art and hopefully one day, in another 6 months 😉 , I’ll have the confidence to paint something of my own and really like it too!

In the meantime, thanks for supporting my mediocre art with your kind comments, it is more appreciated than you can know.

Have a great day!

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